How many times you come accros to conversations that agree something with you, only to find that the latter they not agree with you.
Like for example "It's interesting idea but............", "This purse is beautiful but........". How do you feel when some one continue the words after 'but'. Often times I feel bad, upset and even humilated. Yes ..... I do and what about you? If I feel that way, I reckon somebody else feel the same way to.
Now I am learning the new word. The word that enable me to fit into others feeling or emotion and not rejecting them. The word that enable me to acknowledge them and build rapport with others and redirecting them to the new idea that I want them to follow.
This word is AND. Now write off BUT and change to AND instead. This AND word will create frames of agreement and can bond you with others, which will open the door to redirecting something without creating resistance.
Like for example
" Yes this purse is beautiful (versace) and so this purse (cheaper than versace) and its cheaper"
Or in a conversation
"The only way to stop this terrorist is to kill Osama Ben Laden". Contah la. You can always respond like: "I really appreciate your commitment and desire to make this place a place to live,
and I think there may be other more effective ways than killing Osama. What about this, What about that, so on and so forth......."
This statement make him feel heard and the best is you directing them to the new idea you want them to focus for.
Well ....... I know its hard but still I want to change. So friends, do remind me if I use the word BUT and ask me to change to the word AND.
To change is to prosper. Dr Stephen R. Covey.
